State of mind

I’m like an ocean

Being rocked back and forth
I am better some days and some nights it’s a nightmare
It slowly creeps up on me
I know longer feel it coming
I am it’s pray and it hunts me
I wish I could cry
To feel better
To be better
But it leaves me lost in thought
With pain that numbs me
I sit paralyzed
Wishing I could talk to someone
But all I am is my own medicine and destruction


Sacrifice to gods

My escape has become misery

What once gave me peace and fulfilment

Now leaves me feeling worse and worthless

My littke idols feed of me and I get nothing in return

The doller bills and white lines

The late nights and warm bodies

The elixir in glass bottles

The smoke sacrificed to the heavens

All are prayers for sanity

Prayerd offered to other gods for sound mind

All has become vanity at my young age

What lesson will life teach me that it hasn’t taught man

Even death will spit out an unknown god like me….

I despise life

I hate life

The cruelty and pain that comes with it

The brief Joy and happiness

That we can easily find in a bottle of liquor

You livr everyday and die once

But what say you?

Smile and be strong?

It will get better?

Not all stories have a happy ending

Do not assume the best always

Man has made life wicked

Spilled innocent blood

And gread and lust rules his heart

He has turned himself into an abomination to nature itself

heroine’s and heros 

To our parents and guidians
Both alive and gone

Your wars will never be forgotten

Though we don’t know it or fail to show it

You remain our true heroes

Our second gods

You’ve shared your life force

Money and time on us

Your support and encouragement has equipped us

You’ve wiped our tears and showed us love when we never deserved it

As we grow older

We appreciate all you’ve done

We love you


I dag a little deeper in me and found

A layer were my evil resides

It was beautiful in it’s way

It was clothed in light and dark smoke rose froms its robs

With an elegant bow

I was welcomed

This is were dreams and hope die

A place were you leave your humanity

Your heart will never feel pain

Or care for a soul

Life will be about and for you

With a smile it gazed into my soul

Isn’t this the very thing you desire

Are you willing to trade your soul

In return you find yourself

And with those words I was reborn

worn out

An empty hour

Eyes widely open while others dream

A rush of thoughts

An energy depleted body

The wish of not leaving the bed

Of sinking in it

Enjoying quality time with people dear to your heart

Times up

It’s now or never

The debate in your mind

About obligation and responsibility

You must go and work

Times up

You run around and quickly are on your way

You try your best

But your mind isn’t at work

You dream of being home

In your comfort zone

Were you can easily sleep

You are not happy but you need the pay

And so, you stay

Yet you want to leave

Watching the time tick

Waiting to feel the freedom of walking out